There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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