And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Welp...herpes.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
