no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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