You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
