You can't motorboat a personality
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
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