u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
