Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
you mean i was at the winter classic?
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
