would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
