the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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