i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
