it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
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