She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize