names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize