I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize