Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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