bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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