It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
