He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
