its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I party with great urgency now.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize