my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
