I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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