so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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