why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
