we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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