Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
