i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
