Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.

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(404): View more from Georgia

three words: i give head

(770): View more from Georgia

three words: not that well

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(609): View more from New Jersey

We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.

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(804): View more from Virginia

He likes Jesus. Game over.

(804): View more from Virginia

Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.

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(540): View more from Virginia

About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.

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(315): View more from New York

Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.

(262): View more from Wisconsin

But my shoes looked boss

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