I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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