I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Randomize
