My hand turned me down
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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