Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
