and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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