I think scott just propositioned me for sex
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize