and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
