i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
