I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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