used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
