Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize