they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize
