Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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