There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
