How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
