it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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