Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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