there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize