So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I'm having to shit out rocks
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
