i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
