Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
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That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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