chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
