hotel room ftw
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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