Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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