just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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