In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize